Ultimatums

I live in an old house.  My family and I have lived in it for about ten years, since I came home to Southland.  The roof has leaked for those ten years.  At the time of the stadium collapse when the snow melted it flooded the ceiling and hence the ceiling tiles in our hallway have sagged.  This annoys me.

Despite repeated requests to my husband to fix it it remains saggy – unfixed.

Last week at the start of the cold snap I said to him “if the ceiling collapses I am going to leave you” – and then went to work.

In the work place both employers and employees often make ultimatums.  “If I don’t get a pay rise I am going to leave”.  If you don’t wake up your ideas I am going to fire you”.  Apart from the obvious procedural defects in the latter comment my advice to people is before you make an ultimatum in the work place decide:

               Is the threatened action following the ultimatum legal; and if yes

Do you in fact intend to follow through with said ultimatum. 

I suggest a better way of handling such disputes is mediation.  For example I should have said to my husband “if the ceiling in our hallway collapses due to the fact that you have failed to fix the leak in the roof we will need to engage the services of a marriage counsellor” – See much more sensible.

Texting

Do not text anything that relies upon context to be properly understood. Humour is not always understood in texts .For example my husband and a “discussion” during which I acted irrationally.  I texted him.  “I am sorry xx.”  My husband responded “get @#@#@”.  I took offence.  He thought it was obvious he was joking.  It was not.

Whilst things said face to face are hard to misinterpret – texting is easy.

Sick Days

When ever my husband is ill with “man flu” I basically tell him to harden up. This means that he does not go to bed to get rid of the flu hence he is sicker for longer and this lengthens the period of time I have to listen to his constant groaning when, had I been nice to him at the beginning , he had taken to his bed he gotten over his illness much sooner.

If people are sick at work – send them home.  There is no point in people staying at work, feeling ill, infecting others.  They are best to be sent home out of the work environment to get well.  There are still really good employees who will come to work sick – send them home. 

Other Articles on Bullying:

Not Maori Enough, Workplace Bullying Opens Liability, Dealing With Bullying Bosses